| "Inhibited sexual desire" is the number one sexual problem in the United States today, doctors report. People in their late twenties, thirties, and forties complain that they have little or no interest in sex. Job demands, family responsibilities, lack of time, stress, and fatigue leave many too tired for sex.
Not surprisingly, couples who both work outside the home and also have children are most susceptible to low sexual desire. By the time they hop (or rather, crawl) into bed at night, sex seems like too much bother.
Here are some things a couple can do to rekindle their desire for sex.
- Make a point to spend at least 15 minutes of uninterrupted time together each day. If you can't meet face to face, call each other on the telephone.
- Remember to express your affection for each other every day.
- Plan to spend part of a day alone together at least once a week. Make a date to take a walk in the park, go out for dinner, or share other activities you both enjoy.
- Schedule a weekend away together every two months or so.
- Go to bed together, at the same time. Tell yourself that what you haven't accomplished by 11:00 P.M. can wait until the next day.
- Relax by giving each other a massage or taking a shower together.
- Keep the television out of the bedroom. Watching TV can be sexual suicide.
- Don't worry if your sexual encounters occasionally fail. Fatigue and stress are known to cause temporary impotence, a decrease in vaginal lubrication, or the inability to have an orgasm. Don't let yourselves become preoccupied with performance; just take pleasure in being together. Enjoy hugging, kissing, and caressing.
If attempts to relax and spend more quality time together don't perk up your sex life, consult your doctor. Alcohol, medication, and various other factors can put a damper on desire or performance. |
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